5 Reasons You Shouldn't Get Upset With Your Friend Who's a Bad Texter

Some people are just bad texters.

Like me, for example. It's not that I don't want to chat with my friends or that I don't care enough to respond, it's just that I'm inexplicably bad at managing my phone. There's no real reason for it—it's just the way I am.

Pretty Little Liars: Addison texting

(Pretty Little Liars via Freeform)

Of course, if you're a good texter, it feels like a personal attack when one of your non-texting-inclined friends doesn't immediately shoot you a reply. Not only is it frustrating to wait on their response, it's also difficult to truly comprehend why someone is a bad texter when you're a good texter. However, while you might not understand your pal's texting habits, getting upset with them is not the answer—take it from someone who knows.

So, from the mouth of a bad texter herself, keep scrolling for five reasons you shouldn't get mad at your friend who's a bad texter.

1. Bad Texters Just Don't Care About Texting

In a digital world, it can seem almost inconceivable to think that someone just doesn't care about texting all that much. But for people who are bad at responding, that's exactly the case. Bad texters simply don't assign that much value to texting, so responding doesn't rank very high on our priority list. For me, I don't feel close or connected to people by simply shooting them a text message, so I often just forget to reply, especially if I'm distracted by other things. Texting just doesn't mean anything to me, so it easily slips my mind. When something isn't high on your priority list, it's not something you even think about—hence the constant lack of reply.

Pretty Little Liars: Spencer staring at her phone

(Pretty Little Liars via Freeform)

2. It's Not Personal

When you don't get a text reply from a close pal—or from anyone at all—it can feel really personal. Thankfully, I'm here to tell you: It's not. At least, it's not when it comes from a person who's known for being bad a texting.  That's the great thing about bad texters—we don't discriminate. We don't pick and choose who to reply to because we're simply bad at replying to anyone at all. It has nothing to do with the text you sent or with our feelings for you, it's simply that we aren't putting our text replies at the top of our priority list. It might not ease your anxiety at our lack of response, but at least you can seek some solace in the fact that it has absolutely nothing to do with you.


3. It's Not Reflective of Your Relationship

In much the same way that zero response from a bad texter isn't a personal attack, it's also not reflective of your entire relationship. In fact, we likely still want to spend time with you and love planning activities together, we just might take a little while longer to organize a hangout than some of your other friends. It's easy to take a lack response as a sign that you're just not invested in the relationship, but if your pal is known for being a bad texter, that simply isn't the case. Accept that your friend isn't good at responding, and judge your relationship on other interactions, rather than assigning a bunch of meaning to a text message relationship that just doesn't mean that much to us.

Joey King's character in The Kissing Booth lounging by the pool while on her phone

(The Kissing Booth via Netflix)

4. They'll Respond Eventually

In most cases of bad texters, you can seek solace in the fact that they will respond eventually. Usually if it involves making plans or confirming a hangout, we'll shoot a reply pretty fast. Otherwise, it might be a few hours, but we'll eventually work our way around to responding. And if we don't, we likely won't be offended if you send a double text, mostly because we completely forgot about the first message anyway. Point being, you'll get in contact with us at some point, so it's not the end of the world if it takes a little longer than you were imagining.


5. It's Not a Good Reason to Be Mad

I may be a little biased in this regard, but in all reality, getting angry at someone because they didn't reply to your text messages in a timely manner isn't really a good reason to be mad. If other areas of your relationship are struggling, feel free to bring up their texting habits as a frustrating element of your friendship.

However, if your relationship is perfect and you just happen to get a little frustrated now and then at their texting etiquette, is it really the worst thing in the world? Texting is far from the only determinant of a healthy friendship. And if you really need to get in touch with your bad texter-pal, you can always call and eliminate the need to wait in agony for a response.



Are you the friend who's a bad texter? Click HERE for 10 things only you can understand.