The Type of French Fry You Are, Based on Your Zodiac Sign
French fries are the reason we exist.
We might be exaggerating a bit, but the above statement is at least 75% true. They're a viable food source to help us get through the day, in terms of the nutrition they have to offer and the endless joy they bring into our lives.
We're going to cut this love fest short, because you came here not to discuss your amorous feelings towards potatoes, but to finally discover once and for all which type of fry you're most like.
Needless to say, you've come to the right place. Keep scrolling to discover the type of French fry you are, based on your zodiac sign.
Aries (March 20 – April 19): Shoestring Fries
Bold and courageous, you're the bravest sign when faced with danger, Aries. While there may not be anything that scares you, there are plenty of things that irritate you. To say you have a short temper would be an understatement. Shoestring fries represent the razor thin level of patience you possess. Once you dig into these, they're gone quicker than the plate was set down. And once someone upsets you, that fire is lit and there will be no putting it out any time soon.
Taurus (April 20 – May 20): Garlic Fries
Oh you fancy, huh Taurus? Yeah, you totally are. You know it, we know it, everybody knows it. You can't hide your affinity for the finer things in life, and why should you? You work hard for your money. Because you're a more deluxe individual, you're obviously the physical embodiment of garlic fries. Rich and decadent, eating these fries can make anyone feel as though they're living the high life—even if they were only $3 from Jack in the Box.
Gemini (May 21 – June 20): Sweet Potato Fries
As a sign that represents the best of both worlds, you're equal parts salty and sweet. While the ratio may never be the same from one day to the next, it's just part of who you are. Duality runs deep within your veins, Gemini. It's fairly clear now why we chose sweet potato fries for you, right? We were hoping the whole salty-sweet analogy would give it away. Not only that, this type of fry tends to evoke a feeling of curiosity—a trait you exhibit more than any zodiac sign—with their unique flavor palette.
Cancer (June 21 – July 22): Cheese Fries
You live in your comfort zone and you'll never venture outside of it. We'd usually make some remark about how life begins where your comfort zone ends, but we know that's lost on you, so we won't even bother. Anyway, you're a sign who sticks with what they know and when things get scary, you retreat to a place of, well, comfort. You're shrouded in an invisible security blanket wherever you go, just like the fries that are coated with cheese. One bite of a cheese fry and your life will fall into place. They're as cheerful and soothing as French fries get.
Leo (July 23 – Aug. 22): Curly Fries
A shining star, you're simply the most popular sign in the zodiac. Everyone wants to be a part of your life one way or another. What can we say? You're all that and a bag of chips… or should we say, curly fries? You and these coiled potatoes are truly kindred spirits. Let's face it, curly fries are the preferred fry option when they're available. They reign supreme, and as royalty yourself, you're fairly accustomed to that type of treatment.
Virgo (Aug. 23 – Sept. 22): Standard Fries
If it ain't broke, don't fix it. Right, Virgo? Your analytical nature prevents you from doing anything out of the ordinary or venturing too far from your daily routine. You're a textbook over-thinker who plays it safe, but you're perfect just the way you are—much like a regular ol' French fry. You don't need any extra pizazz to wow a crowd, because you do so by keeping it simple as always. After all, why mess with a good thing?
Libra (Sept. 23 – Oct. 22): Waffle Fries
Being surrounded by people at all hours of the day isn't everyone's cup of tea, but it definitely is yours, Libra. You're a highly social being who can't stand to be alone, much like the fries that make up a single waffle fry. Not only do they come in a group, but their criss-cross pattern makes them inseparable… well not all that inseparable, but you catch our drift. You can't go through life on your own, and neither can these fries.
Scorpio (Oct. 23 – Nov. 21): Cottage Fries
A little rougher around the edges than most, you keep everything hidden deep below your calm exterior. You don't really showcase your emotions, because you don't see the point. We know, however, that you're a little more sensitive than you lead on. Much like you, a cottage fry has a rigid surface, but it's soft and mushy on the inside. Not only that, but it likes to be hidden under a variety of toppings, never revealing it's true form to any soul. It's even a mysterious bit of food, but nowhere near as alluring as you.
Sagittarius (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21): Smiley Fries
Optimist is your middle name, Sagittarius. Though you've suffered your fair share of hard times, you don't let that crush your joyous spirit. Preferring to keep things light and airy, you're the first one to crack a joke when you notice the vibe getting tense. Humor is how you communicate best, mainly because you just want to see everyone happy and proudly wearing a smile on their face. Smiley fries pretty much do what you do, but in a lot less time, and without having to crack far too many dad jokes. Don't ever change, Sag.
Capricorn (Dec. 22 – Jan. 19): Steak Fries
Reliable Capricorn, your loved ones know they can always count on you for anything. Seeing as you're the ultimate family person, you care deeply about those closest to you, whether they're related to you or not. You're strong and sturdy, much like a streak fry, always knowing what to do. An excellent leader, you can tackle any project without crumbling under the pressure. A steak fry gets you on that level, too, seeing as they're stable enough to hold any condiment. Stay thick.
Aquarius (Jan. 20 – Feb. 18): Tater Tots
You don't play by the rules, Aquarius, and neither do we. You're a breed of your own, often being the rebellious little soul we all know and love. This is why you're a tater tot. You can't be molded into what society expects you to be, so you stand out from the crowd as best and often as you can. Tater tots are fries, whether the world wants to admit it or not. Just because they don't fit the classic fry shape, doesn't mean they aren't a version of the junk food.
Pisces (Feb. 19 – March 19): Crinkle-Cut Fries
There's something so magical about a crinkle-cut fry. They're warm and inviting, offering their comforting taste and texture to the world whenever they need it. They can turn a bad day good and a good day even better. You also have that power, though you may not know it. A sweet and kind spirit, you're always there for the people you care about most. You're a person anyone's lucky to have in their corner or fry basket.
Looking to satisfy your fry fix? One of THESE six French fry creations is exactly what you're looking for.