5 Most Likely Reasons You Were Ghosted by a Friend

Getting ghosted by a friend is totally different than getting ghosted by someone you're dating—but they both suck.

When it comes to dating, the whole process is complicated and confusing, and we've come to the sad realization that no one's ever really safe in their situation. But when it comes to friendship, to be completely disregarded out of the blue comes as a complete shock.

Gossip Girl: Blair and Serena laughing together

(Gossip Girl via The CW)

Real friends are supposed to stand by us through thick and thin; they're supposed to feel comfortable talking to us if they have a problem with our friendship; they're supposed to lean on us in times of need. So if they shun us without warning, it's a major curveball thrown our way.

That said, even if the ghosting is seemingly out of nowhere to you, the decision didn't come out of nowhere for them. Keep reading for the five most likely reasons you were ghosted by a friend.

1. They Feel Inferior Around You

Oddly enough, sometimes being ghosted is actually a backhanded compliment. It's an insult because yeah, you were straight-up 86'd from a person's life, but, in some cases, it's because it's too difficult for that person to witness your success or booming social life. While you may have actually done nothing but act as a wonderful friend, if someone isn't where they want to be in their own life, it's incredibly difficult for them to constantly be surrounded by a person who is thriving. Instead of your positivity lifting them up, it can actually be just another reminder of how much they're lacking.

While that certainly doesn't make it right for them to leave you in the cold, it's also not the easiest to tell you they feel inferior around you. A cowardly move, yes—but if you sense this may be why they did it, just know it'them, not you. And accept that you're much better off with people on your same wavelength.

Gossip Girl: Blair and Serena in an elevator

(Gossip Girl via The CW)

 

2. They're Dealing With Personal Issues

Similar to a person who feels inferior to you, someone dealing with serious personal issues may ghost you because of reasons totally out of your control. It could be that the person just wants to keep to themself during the difficult time, or only be surrounded by others dealing with the same thing. It's really hard to pinpoint just what triggered their decision to ice you out, but it's healthiest for them to stay self-focused for now. As much as you want to lend a helping hand (and think that's what they want deep down), they'll appreciate you far more for respecting their privacy.

 

3. They've Been Influenced by Another Person

Again, not your fault, but totally crappy nonetheless. Whereas in the case of the aforementioned reasons (which have nothing to do with you directly), being ghosted due to a third party's influence leaves the power of your friendship in someone else's hands. Whether it's your friend's controlling S.O., who wants to hoard all their attention; a friend of theirs who can't stand you; or their parent, who deems you a bad influence, it's beyond frustrating knowing that your friend is essentially brainwashed by someone else. While indeed this sucks, leave the weakling in the hands of this other person. Chances are someone will sway them from that person down the line, too.

Chuck and Blair Holding Hands

(Gossip Girl via The CW)

 

4. They've Been Influenced by a Rumor

The nasty game of telephone can have worrisome effects. If you've been ghosted, there's a good chance it could all be one giant misunderstanding. If you're sitting here scratching your head, having gone through the possibilities above and can't come to any other conclusion, it's time to consider there may be an untrue rumor floating around that caught wind of your pal's ear.

If you think this may be the case, you need to squash that falsehood immediately by reaching out to your friend and asking if there's a reason why you haven't heard from them. Be straightforward about your concern, because you can't seem to figure out why else they'd be avoiding you. If this rumor is totally untrue and they refuse to hear you out, then good riddance—you don't want them around anyway.

 

5. They're Simply Over It

Ah, the ghosting decision that stems from the hard truth. If you've endured a rocky relationship with a friend, there's a chance they may be over it once and for all—so much so that they don't even feel like an explanation is in order. While this cop-out may seem hurtful and unfair, your former friend may have gotten to a point where they just can't take it anymore, and all respect has been lost.

You may feel like you're left in the dark, but it's important to see things from their perspective. Was the relationship completely beyond repair? Did you do something unforgivable? Did they not want the burden of you begging for them to take you back? When a relationship of any kind is at its lowest point, it makes sense if one of its members wants to back down. The constant stress caused by all the ups and downs can't possibly be appealing. While getting ghosted is obviously hurtful, if your friend felt compelled to take such extreme measures, it's a surefire sign your friendship was in a dark place that you'll be much healthier removed from.

Gossip Girl Blair grimacing

(Gossip Girl via The CW)

 

Is there a friend who's still in your life, but exhibits questionable behavior? Click HERE for subtle signs someone doesn't respect you.