6 Important Rules to Establish When You Live With Roommates

Living with roommates can either be the best thing ever or a total nightmare. Often, the difference starts with the basics of setting a few ground rules.

Whether you're sharing a place with best friends or complete strangers, being on the same page and being able to communicate is absolutely essential, not just for your own happiness and comfort, but for everyone else's as well. If you're not sure where to start, below are six important rules to establish early on with your roommates.

Keep and Respect Schedules

No matter what stage of life you're at, chances are that you and your roommates are going to have schedules that don't precisely line up. Sharing your routines so you know when people are coming and going can be a big help in ensuring your schedules don't interfere with each other. It can also be beneficial to have a set calendar for things like showering and even making breakfast so no one gets held up.

We also suggest setting quiet hours, so that whether someone is an early riser or a night owl, everyone knows not to be too loud or disruptive during certain times of the day. If you all happen to be up at 5 a.m. or love staying up until the late hours of the morning, that works, too!

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Share and Split the Bills

Sharing a place with someone also means sharing the bills, which can include everything from rent and utilities to groceries and even things like streaming services and delivery memberships. We suggest making a list of every recurring bill and splitting everything evenly, unless it's agreed upon that any person should pay a bigger share for any reason, such as having the master bedroom, using up more electricity because they work from home or eating way more food than others.

 

Also read about: 6 Signs You Might Be the Messy Roommate

 

Establish Kitchen Rules

For whatever reason, kitchen activities can be a major source of conflict in shared spaces. The key to peace is consistent rules for using the space as well as how food and drinks are shared (if at all). While some folks love to be collaborative in the kitchen, others can't feeling crowded when they're cooking. Some people are comfortable sharing everything in the fridge and pantry, while others prefer to only purchase for themselves. Any way is valid if you all agree on it. We also suggest labeling personal food and drink items when necessary, and figuring out how to divide grocery bills in the case you're more than happy to share.

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Agree on Guest Guidelines

Every household will have different ideas for what is and isn't appropriate in terms of inviting over guests. Some people might have a straightforward no-guests-allowed policy, while for others, the more, the merrier. If you fall somewhere in between, work together to agree on guidelines for guests. Are they allowed to stay overnight? Should they be out by quiet time? Is it okay for someone to be over for multiple hours each and every day? Talking through all of these questions will help you figure out what works together.

 

Also read about: How to Navigate Roommate Conflicts in College

 

Discuss Shared Spaces and Cleanliness

When you live with other people, maintaining the order and cleanliness of shared spaces becomes everyone's job. Areas including living rooms, the kitchen and shared bathrooms can get neglected when responsibility isn't discussed and shared, so make sure to talk out how these places are maintained. This includes everything from how they're decorated to how they're kept clean, both in terms of overall tidiness and actual dirt and grime.

It may seem silly at first, but a chore schedule will be your best friend in keeping everyone happy and your place clean. Maybe you'll agree to equally divide every chore on set alternating schedules, or perhaps there are some tasks that people actually like to do, so they take them on fully while the other jobs get divided up.

Other considerations for shared spaces include setting thermostats to an appropriate and comfortable temperature for every roommate, as well as being mindful of strong fragrances if anyone happens to be sensitive to them.

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Maintain Open Communication

Perhaps the most important rule in having a great relationship with your roommates is that you can maintain open communication. This means not just telling them what's working well for you, but what isn't. Do what you can to create an environment where people feel they can voice an opinion without criticism or pushback—and remember that this goes both ways. Be open to the fact that you may occasionally be in the wrong, reacting not with defensiveness, but a listening ear.

You may want to set up a time every week or two to ensure that people are happy, giving everyone a chance to voice any concerns. You may occasionally need to revisit the ground rules you've set and tweak them to accommodate changed feelings or circumstances. It's all about finding a middle ground. Most important, don't forget that when conflict comes up, it's not you against them—it's all of you against the problem.

 

For more on the subject, click HERE to learn about the seven types of roommates you might have in college.