Questions We All Ask Ourselves While Going Through an Ex's Social Media
It happens to the best of us—you'll be scrolling through Insta when suddenly you see your ex in a mutual friend's photo, and then before you know it, you realize you've been scrolling through their pics for two hours.
There can be something irresistible about checking in on someone who used to be in your life, even when you know it'll only make you feel terrible. But if you've fallen into this trap time and time again, rest assured that you're not alone. We've been there, and we've collected a list of all the questions you ask yourself while going through your ex's social media.
'Why Am I Looking at This Profile Again?'
When a breakup is new, you might find yourself going through your ex's profile not just occasionally, but often, in an attempt to keep up with them. You don't necessarily want to, and know that checking in on them constantly isn't exactly healthy, but you just can't help it. Something in the back of your head tells you that you should see it if they say something about you, even when you know the chances of that happening are close to zero. And no matter how many times you ask yourself why you're back again, it probably won't be the last time you click through.
'I Totally Don't Care—Or Do I?'
Looking at an ex's posts can fill you with all kinds of strange emotions. You might feel completely apathetic until you see something that reminds you of the time you spent together, and then suddenly get hit with a wave of emotions. But do you actually miss them a ton, or are you just being reminded of the good times in a way that's actually totally unrealistic? If you weren't missing them until you started browsing their profile, it's time to stop looking and resume your life.
'Who Is That Girl?'
When you don't have all of the information, there's a lot of potential to see pics on your ex's profile that make you super jealous. A photo could be completely innocent, but when you're creeping on their page with the wrong frame of mind, it's not hard to start seeing people as threats—even if you're not in that relationship anymore. Jealousy is completely normal, but remember you don't have to be putting yourself through this. Whether someone in their photo with them is just a friend or their new partner, it's not your business anymore, and you don't really have a say either way.
'They're Faking Being This Happy, Right?'
It's always important to remember that social media isn't real. It's a curated reality that only shows off the parts of your life that you want other people to see. Since it's not an accurate portrayal, you shouldn't compare your own life to what you see on the page. If you're going through their pics for signs that they're unhappy, you're probably not going to find them. However, just because they might be faking it doesn't mean you should also spend every minute nitpicking their pictures to prove it. Take it all with a grain of salt and try not to think about it too hard.
'Why Do I Keep Doing This? It Always Makes Me Miserable'
Chances are that a light social media stalking of your ex will make you feel worse off than when you started. Seeing them at all can stir up all kinds of feelings that you thought you were through with, and watching their life unfold happily without you in it (whether they're truly happy or not) can make you feel inadequate, even what that's not the case. It's time to stop putting energy into a past that no longer benefits you, and stop hurting yourself because you think you'll get something out of the equation. In that case, it's probably time to block them—or at least unfollow—and do what you can to move on.
Need more advice on your ex? Click HERE to find out how to deal when you can't avoid your ex's new S.O.