As much as we love Instagram, it can sure create a lot of problems.

Worrying about your like ratio, obsessing over your aesthetic and freaking out about your follower count are all valid preoccupations when managing your ‘gram. However, there’s one person you definitely don’t want as a follower: your significant other’s ex.

Unfortunately, dependent on your S.O.’s past relationships, that could be a real problem. Keep scrolling for what to do if your S.O.’s ex hits the follow button on your account.

Don’t Freak Out

When you first see that your S.O.’s ex followed you on Instagram, you’ll probably feel a permeating sense of dread. Not only is it totally out of the blue, it also feels like a weird invasion of privacy. Feeling annoyed or angry is more than fine, as long as you don’t act on it. Allowing yourself to give into your negative feelings will likely lead to some pretty disastrous reactions, like sending the ex an angry DM or even going off on your S.O. In order to deal with the situation, it’s best to maintain a clear head, so don’t allow yourself to freak out over a simple follow.

Crazy ex-Girlfriend Rebecca staring at her phone

(Crazy Ex-Girlfriend via The CW)


Take Inventory

Exes don’t just follow people out of the blue. If your S.O.’s ex followed you on Instagram, there’s definitely a reason for it—you just have to figure out what that is. Before you act, take a quick inventory of everything you know about this ex. Also, take an inventory of any ex-related red flags that may have come up with your partner. One legitimate fear is that their ex is following you because they’re still in contact with your S.O. and therefore feel comfortable enough inserting themselves into your partner’s personal life via you.

If you don’t come up with anything problematic while looking over the situation, you can probably chalk up their follow to plain, old-fashioned jealousy. If that’s the case, you have no need to worry. We’ve all been a little catty about our former partner’s new girlfriend. Thankfully, their feelings about your relationship aren’t really your problem.


Talk to Your Partner

Whether you come up with red flags or not while taking inventory of the situation, you should always talk to your partner. After all, it’s their ex who’s being weird. However, you have to approach the situation calmly. Mention to them that their ex followed you on Instagram, and casually bring up any worries you might have over the situation. Chances are your partner won’t really care beyond thinking it’s a little odd, but they may even have more insight for you as to why that happened.

Whatever you do, make sure you’re cool, calm and collected while talking to your S.O. Annoying as it is, it’s nothing more than an Instagram follow. If you come in too hot, you could end up looking like the bad guy in the situation. Remaining calm and approaching it with a clear head ensures that the attention stays focused on the real problem: their ex.

Hanna looking at her phone on Pretty Little Liars

(Pretty Little Liars via Freeform)


Force Unfollow

Of course, you should never allow your S.O.’s ex to follow you on Instagram. If your account is set to private, don’t even confirm the request. If your account is public, you can use Instagram’s handy dandy “remove follower” feature. Simply go to your follower list, click on the three dots next to their ex’s name, and hit “remove.” Allowing them to follow you doesn’t have any purpose, other than showing off how happy you and your S.O. are. Not only is that a catty thought, it’s also inviting drama into your life, especially if they decide they don’t like what you’re posting. Better to just leave them in your S.O.’s past where they belong.



So you’ve done all the above steps, but you’re still uncomfortable with your S.O.’s ex having any kind of access to your account. Or, even worse, you’ve done everything right and your S.O.’s ex simply won’t leave you alone over social media. In those cases, it’s completely okay to block them altogether. Blocking should definitely be a last resort, as it’s a bit of an overreaction to such a simple situation. However, it is your Instagram, so whatever you need to do to make yourself comfortable on your own account is more than okay, at least by our standards.


Looking for more inspiration to elevate your Insta game? Click HERE for the best hip-hop lyrics to use as Instagram captions for all your prom posts.