The 9 Frustrating Stages of Waiting for Your Crush to Text You Back

Texting your crush can be quite the emotional rollercoaster, mostly because you never really know what's going to happen.

And while the lead-up to sending that first text can be nerve-racking enough, there's nothing that compares to the emotional struggle of waiting for a response.

While we can't help ease your anxiety, we can at least let you know you're not alone. Keep scrolling for the nine frustrating stages of waiting for your crush to text back.

1. Avoidance

Well, you've finally typed out that first message to your crush, vetted it in the group chat and quickly hit send. Now you enter the avoidance stage, the very first phase in waiting for a reply. You hop in the shower, put your phone on silent, start watching a long movie—basically you engage in any activity that will keep you from examining your phone for a little while. If your crush texts back immediately you don't want to see it right away because you want to wait a while before you reply, and if they don't text back you want to give yourself a little time before you start freaking out. The obvious solution? Just avoid your phone all together until you're emotionally prepared to handle either outcome.

Hanna checking her texts

(Pretty Little Liars via Freeform)


2. Overthinking

After the avoidance stage, when you've finally worked up the courage to check your phone and realized that you haven't yet received a response, you immediately enter the stage of overthinking. You read and reread your message countless times, wondering if it was too witty or not witty enough, if you should have gone simpler or been more elaborate—you even start to question whether you should have texted them at all, which vaults you right into the regret stage.


3. Regret

In the regret stage, you come to the absolute conclusion that you definitely should not have texted your crush. Now things are just going to be weird and it's all your fault. You should've known that they didn't want to talk to you, and now they're going to be aware of your feelings, and every interaction is just going to be so uncomfortable. The regret stage basically consists of you beating yourself up about your decision to text your crush, but your sorrow about their lack of response doesn't end there.


4. Annoyance

After you've fully berated yourself for your decision to text your crush, you enter the annoyance stage. In this phase, you start to realize that it's ridiculous to blame yourself for their lack of response. All you did was send a text message—that's literally so normal. In fact, texting is so easy, is it really that hard to just send a quick reply? In the annoyance stage, your anger about the lack of response transfers from yourself to your crush. You become irritated with the fact that they can't make time to send one tiny little text message and you start to convince yourself that you're so upset you don't even want them to reply anymore.

Gilmore Girls: Rory staring at her phone

(Gilmore Girls via The CW)


5. Denial

Okay, so you might've lied about not wanting them to reply. As the annoyance stage fades, you fully enter the denial stage. This stage is where you start to tell yourself all kinds of lies about why your crush hasn't texted back. Maybe they never got the message or their reply never came through. Maybe they lost their phone recently and haven't yet replaced it. Or maybe they're in real danger stranded on the top of a mountain with no cell service—how terrible would that be? You refuse to accept that maybe your crush just doesn't want to talk to you and instead convince yourself that you'll receive a response eventually. It just might take a little longer than you wanted it to.


6. Anger

As the denial stage starts to fade and you begin to come to terms with the fact that they really just aren't going to respond, you enter the anger phase. How dare they not reply to you? Do they have any idea what a catch you are? You're a hard eight and they're a soft four—how could they possibly be putting you through this much frustration? In fact, you don't need them anyway, you deserve so much better than this.


7. Ultimatum

Eventually, the anger stage slowly but surely gives way to the ultimatum stage. This is it. You are done. If they don't reply within the next 10 minutes, then you swear you're never speaking to them ever again. That's right—10 minutes and you're cutting off all contact.

Cheryl on her phone at Pop's on Riverdale

(Riverdale via The CW)


8. Acceptance

So the 10 minutes went by… and you didn't receive a text. You're suddenly vaulted right into the acceptance stage. They're not going to reply, but that's okay. You're sad and a little disappointed, but you recognize that it's not the end of the world. You stop obsessively checking your phone and updating your friends on the lack of response. You've come to terms with the fact that a response text is not in your future, and you're ready to let it go and move on.


9. Forgiveness

Whether your crush ever decides to text you back or not, you'll eventually enter the forgiveness stage. Yes, you swore you'd never speak to them again, but that was before they smiled at you in the hallway today. They're so cute—how could you stay mad at them? In fact, you might even try sending another text sometime soon. Because maybe they actually didn't receive it, you know?


Worried about sending the perfect text to your crush? We can help! Click HERE to see what you can text your crush besides 'hey'.