When it comes to finding your forever person, there’s a lot to consider.

From the initial first few dates, to the in-depth conversations, over time, you get to know the other person on a deep and emotional level. But what characteristics make for a long-lasting relationship?

Keep reading for the 35 things to look for in a partner:

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1. They Communicate With You

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One of the most important things to have in a relationship is communication. If your partner doesn’t know how to properly communicate, you’re already doomed from the beginning. By actually talking about each other’s thoughts and feelings, you’re on your way down a healthy and long path.

2. They Trust You

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What’s a relationship without trust? If you feel the need to constantly be checking in on your partner, you need to ask yourself why they make you feel this way. The same can be said the other way around—if they have trust issues themselves, it’s something they’ll need to work on. By showing trust in you, your relationship will get stronger.

3. They Have Chemistry With You

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The first thing we notice when we meet someone new is their looks. Then, comes the personality. The combination of the whole package is where it truly matters, though. A healthy relationship requires a lot of things, but one of the super important ones is chemistry. Find a partner who is attracted to you, and vice versa.

4. They’re Constantly Growing

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As we get older, we grow both physically and mentally. Be sure to look for a partner who is willing to expand their beliefs. If they’re willing to learn new life lessons, it shows that they’re mature. Your partner needs to have the capacity to constantly grow, because without change, how can you ever expect to learn from your past mistakes?

5. They Listen to You

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Isn’t it so annoying when you’re having a conversation with someone, but you can tell they aren’t paying attention? It makes you feel invalid and like what you have to say doesn’t matter. That’s why it’s vital to find a partner who hears you out. Even if the two of you don’t agree on something, listening to each other’s thoughts and beliefs and respecting them is all that matters.

6. They Make You Laugh

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Don’t you think life would be better if every day was filled with laughter and smiles? Make sure to find a partner who knows how to make you chuckle. And no, they don’t need to be the “class clown,” but someone who can be silly with you or simply make you giggle is so important. After all, have you ever even heard of a healthy relationship without laughter?

7. They Support Your Dreams

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No matter how big or small our dreams may be, you should have a partner by your side who is willing to support those lofty goals. If they tell you you’re not good enough or it’s unrealistic, they simply don’t believe in you. Find yourself a fellow dreamer who sees the possibilities in life. If they’re by your side when chasing your dreams, they’re definitely a keeper.

8. They’re Patient With You

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It can be super frustrating when someone has no patience. In a relationship, patience is absolutely necessary. You don’t want a partner who rushes you into things or simply can’t wait. They should be able to respect your boundaries and the amount of time you need to feel things out. If they rush you, it leads to resentment, anger and lots of confusion.

9. They’re Spontaneous

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Every relationship needs a bit of spontaneity. You don’t want to go through life knowing exactly what to expect and what’s going to happen. Life’s full of surprises, so look for a partner who’s constantly keeping you on your toes. Whether it’s taking you out to an unplanned dinner or taking a road trip, spontaneity is a trait that should be at the top of your must-have list.

10. They Know How to Compromise

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Any healthy relationship requires compromise. Since the two of you obviously won’t agree with one another on every single little thing, both of you need to do a bit of give and take. If your partner doesn’t compromise, they’re essentially taking charge of the relationship, your life and your future. If they let you have it your way every now and then, that just shows how much they respect you.

11. They’re Independent

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While of course you should want to spend time with your S.O., some time apart is necessary for a thriving partnership. Be sure to find a person who knows how to survive on their own and doesn’t depend on you for everything. They should have their own group of friends and hobbies that you don’t necessarily have to take part in.

12. They’re Not Controlling

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Isn’t it unflattering when you see a couple and one of them is clearly controlling the other’s every move? Whether it’s something subtle like always grabbing their hand in front of an ex, or it’s something more obvious like not letting them hang out with their friends, control is a very touchy subject. Your partner should allow you to make your own decisions.

13. They’re Affectionate

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One thing a lot of strong relationships have in common is affection. Whether that fondness is shown through big, dramatic gestures, or through the little, everyday things, it’s vital! Your partner should want to hug you, kiss you and shower you with love all the time. Affection is a definite must when you’re on the hunt for your forever person.

14. They Respect You

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One of the most annoying things we deal with in life is rude people who show no respect. So why would you want to be with someone like that romantically? Your partner should have the utmost respect for you. Whether it’s being respectful of your decisions or respecting you in front of other people, you need it to survive any relationship.

15. They Make You Feel Safe

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Your partner should make you feel safe. And no, we don’t mean to go for a “safe” person, but your partner should be the person you rely on! If you need a reminder that you’re going to make it through the day, your S.O. should be the first person that comes to mind and brings a smile to your face.

16. They Excite You

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The last thing anyone wants is a boring and mundane relationship. That’s why we believe it’s important for your S.O. to excite you. No matter how many days, months or years the two of you have been together, if you still don’t occasionally get that feeling of butterflies in the pit of your stomach, you need to do some reevaluating.

17. They Treat Your Family With Respect

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Don’t you want to be with a person who gets along with and respects your family? If you’re personally very close with your immediate family, we’re willing to bet you want them to like your S.O. just as much as you want your S.O. to like your family. If they respect your loved ones, that just goes to show what great characteristics they have.

18. They Surprise You

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It’s easy to fall into a routine. There’s nothing wrong with it, don’t get us wrong, but at the same time, it’s nice to be surprised every once in a while. This is especially true when it comes to romantic relationships. Your partner should want to surprise you, whether it’s something as small as getting you your favorite coffee, or something bigger like setting up a romantic picnic.

19. They Apologize When They’re Wrong

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We all screw up sometimes—that’s just life! When your partner does something wrong, they need to have the courage to own up to it and apologize for their actions. They need to be sincere in their apology and have a conversation with you. Why did they do it? Did they learn from their mistake? These are all very vital points to cover.

20. They Call You Out When You’re Wrong

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The same can be said for when you mess up. Whether you say something inappropriate or don’t have the best intentions, your partner should be willing to call you out on it. Healthy relationships are by no means easy, and these specific conversations won’t be painless, but that’s why they’re so important!

21. They Like Hearing About Your Day

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Even though a lot of our days might seem to be mundane or boring to other people, our partners should want to hear about them. They’re the person you should be able to go to and talk about the funny thing you saw in line at the coffee shop or the weird dream you had. And the same should be said for you!

22. They Want to Travel With You

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Traveling is something we should all experience. And no, we’re not saying you need to book the next flight out to Europe—it can be something local! Whether you try out a new restaurant on the other side of town, go to the farmer’s market or take a day drip down south, traveling with your partner should be at the top of both of your lists.

23. They Want to Chill With You

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When you aren’t traveling and out of the house, your partner should also be content just staying in and hanging out on the couch. If you can do absolutely nothing with your partner and actually be happy doing it, you’ve found yourself a keeper. Whether you’re watching Netflix or you’re both reading books on the porch, it’s the simple things that you’ll come to appreciate!

24. They Know How to Manage Their Time

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As we grow up, we all learn about time management. It comes naturally to some of us, but it can be quite difficult for others. Find yourself a partner who knows how to properly manage their time between you, their friends, family, hobbies, work and anything else. By adequately managing their time, your relationship will grow because of it!

25. They’re Compassionate

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Don’t you find that compassionate people are more attractive? When someone wants to help others or is able to show empathy, it speaks volumes about what type of person they are. Your partner should be able to show compassion. Without compassion in a relationship, how are you ever supposed to succeed if your partner can’t try to understand what you’re going through?

26. They Have a Strong Work Ethic

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In order to succeed in life, having a strong work ethic is an absolute necessity. Whether your partner is still in school or has a job, how seriously they take their work shows a lot about their personality and their future. Your partner shouldn’t brush off their work, but instead, they should put value and intent into their actions.

27. They Put You First

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We’re not saying you should be put first in every situation, because there are times when it doesn’t make sense. However, your partner should try to put you first most of the time. In order to feel loved, you need to see that you are a priority in our S.O.’s life. Even if it’s something as simple as saying no to a night out and staying in with you, it makes all the difference.

28. They’re Committed to You

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Find yourself a partner that is truly committed to you. You don’t want to find yourself in a relationship down the line where they don’t take you seriously. Be sure that they’re committed to you and only you. Your partner should be there for you in the good times, the bad times and all the in between.

29. They’re Open-Minded

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Relationships are where people grow. You tend to go into a relationship one way, and come out of it completely different. Mostly, it’s in a good way, and you’ve been able to learn something. Your partner should be open-minded and willing to listen to your opinions. Not only that, but they should be willing to change their own opinions as well!

30. They Go to You for Advice

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When you come home from a long day of being at work or school, and you have something on your mind that you need advice about, don’t you want your S.O. to be that person you go to? Your partner should not only be there to help you figure out what to do, but they should do so happily. They shouldn’t tell you what you want to hear, but what you need to hear.

31. They Motivate You

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You know those days where you feel like doing absolutely nothing, even though you have no excuse to do so? While it’s totally normal to have off days, it’s important to not let them become a habit. Your partner should be there for you on the sidelines, being your source of motivation. Whether it’s to get up earlier, hit the gym or start that business you’ve been talking about, motivation can go a long way!

32. They’re Present When You’re Together

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Don’t you find it annoying when someone just doesn’t seem to be present when you’re together? Whether they’re on their phone or seem to be daydreaming, it’s completely disrespectful! Find yourself a partner who knows how to be in the moment with you. The two of you will be able to connect on a deeper level by turning off the outside noise.

33. They Inspire You

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Your S.O. should be a major source of inspiration for you! We’re not saying they need to be out there saving the world or anything, but by finding a partner who inspires you, you’ve found yourself a keeper. Even if they inspire you in little ways, it will make a big difference in your day-to-day lives with one another.

34. They’re Loyal to You

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Loyalty has got to be one of the most important things to look for in a partner, and for good reason! Without it, how are you expected to trust someone? Not only should they have your back by not cheating, but they should be loyal to the promises they’ve made you, as well. If they break their word all the time, it may be time to reconsider things.

35. They Make You Genuinely Happy

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At the end of the day, aren’t we all just looking for someone to make us happy—genuinely happy? Your partner should be your source of happiness. At the end of a long day, knowing you get to come home to them or even speak with them on the phone should make everything worth it. Happiness is something not to be taken for granted, especially in a relationship.

Love being with your partner? Click HERE for things to do if you struggle with spending time apart.

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35 Things to Look for in a Partner

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