How to Speak Your Crush's Love Language Most Effectively
Ah, love languages.
Originally invented by Dr. Gary Chapman, the love languages refer to the five different ways that we all give and receive love. They've become a major topic of conversation over the years, mostly due to their ability to mend struggling relationships by adjusting your actions to meet your partner's needs.
And it's not just relationships. If you have some insight into your crush's love language, you can use that knowledge to communicate your affection, and maybe just make them fall for you in the process.
Sound too good to be true? It's not. Keep scrolling for our tips on how to speak your crush's love language most effectively.
Acts of Service
Acts of service is a tricky love language to master, mostly because it involves anticipating another person's needs. If your crush's primary love language is acts of service, they feel affection most deeply through action. More specifically, they feel loved when someone does something for them, especially something they didn't really want to do themselves.
Acts of service can be a little hard to speak with a crush, especially because you don't want to let them take advantage of you. You'll have to make slight adjustments, but you can still show them how much you care. Helping them with their homework, tagging along to help with an errand they need to run, offering to pack them lunch once a week or bringing them an afternoon snack because you know they get hungry can all count as acts of service. In acts of service, it's all about remembering the little things, and doing your best to help your crush out.
If you're speaking acts of service with a crush, it's important to remember that you shouldn't feel taken advantage of. You want to show them you care, but you also shouldn't be sacrificing your own well-being to help them out. Once you're in a relationship, it's easier to commit more energy to your partner, but while you're still in the crush stage, you need to be mindful of the fact that you should only push yourself as far as you feel comfortable.
Words of Affirmation
As the name implies, words of affirmation hinges on the verbal exchange between you and your crush. If this is your crush's primary love language, they feel affection when they hear words that build them up, most often in the form of compliments, appreciation and encouragement.
If you want to communicate your affection to your crush using words of affirmation, compliments are always a safe route. Something simple as telling them how nice they look will go a long way towards making them feel loved. If you struggle to give compliments freely, encouragement can be your fallback. Telling your crush that you're impressed by them or that you know they can accomplish a difficult task will be particularly touching for someone who needs words of affirmation.
Certain things should always be kept in mind while attempting to speak words of affirmation. First, even if you think your crush knows exactly how you feel, you should always say the words out loud. They need spoken words to feel loved, so assuming that they know what you mean will ruin your chance to show them affection. An empathetic and appreciative tone will also go a long way towards communicating your affection to your crush. Lastly, you must always ensure that your words are sincere. If you say things just to say them, your crush will be able to tell. Words of affirmation isn't about just saying nice things, it's about picking out what you genuinely like about your crush and simply finding the courage to say it out loud.
Physical touch can be difficult to communicate with a crush, mostly because few of us are comfortable enough to break the barrier of touch with someone we're still developing feelings for. For a crush who needs physical touch, however, speaking this language effectively can make all the difference in how they feel about you.
First and foremost, you have to use the right kind of touch. Those who primarily identify with physical touch crave affectionate touch that makes them feel secure and safe. Holding hands, a touch on the arm, a heartfelt hug—these are all incredible ways to communicate affectionate touch.
To speak physical touch with your crush, you have to take every opportunity to break the physical barrier between the two of you. Giving them a hug every time you say hello and goodbye is a perfect way to start. It's natural and comfortable, but it also allows you to communicate affection in a way that speaks to them. Other than that, you should generally be on the lookout for little ways to touch your crush. Whether it's grabbing their hand in a moment of excitement or patting them on the shoulder when they've accomplished something big, any kind of small touch will be highly effective in showing your crush just how much you care.
You might know your crush's love language, but what about your own? Click HERE for your love language, based on your zodiac sign.