Reasons Not To Jump Into Your Next Relationship After a Breakup

Breakups put us through the ringer.

Whether your relationship was great (until it wasn't) or pretty much always a dumpster fire, endings are rarely easy. It always takes some amount of time to heal after a breakup, which may be why so many people get a new haircut or buy a new wardrobe after they split with someone—it's a way to press the reset button.

One other way to press the reset button is by dating someone new pretty quickly after you end things with your significant other. While it's not always a bad idea (plenty of so-called "rebounds" do become long-term, fulfilling relationships), if you check any of these boxes, you may want to reconsider dating someone so soon after you and your ex said goodbye.

You're Doing It to Spite Your Ex

If your first thought when saying "yes" to a date with someone new is so that you can rub it in your ex's face, you may want to pump the brakes. Sure, it's nice to feel like you "won" the breakup by moving on faster than the other person, but try to see things from your new person's perspective. It's not fun to date someone who is focusing all their attention on making their ex upset instead of genuinely trying to form a new connection.


Your Friends Are Pushing You Into It

Your friends probably mean well—they want you to get back out there! However, if you find that your friends are insisting you move on with someone new when you simply aren't in the right headspace to date anyone, it's okay to tell them you need to pause on any romantic prospects. Deciding to stay single for a bit doesn't mean that you're not working on getting over your ex.


(Ginny and Georgia via Netflix)


You Think Dating Someone New Will Fix Everything

If you find yourself in a repeat pattern where you break up with someone just to immediately jump into a new relationship, it may be because you are putting way too much weight into what a romance will do for your life. Dating someone great is a nice bonus to your life, but it's not going to make your life perfect or complete—and, if you're not doing the proper vetting to make sure this new person fits well into your world in the first place, you could end up in a cycle of going through people you ultimately just feel "meh" about.

You and Your Ex Aren't Totally Over

Maybe you and your ex decided you're "done," but you still talk all the time—and maybe even are open to hooking up again. If you have the sense that you and your ex haven't quite closed the chapter on your relationship, you should figure that out where you really stand before bringing someone new into the equation. Otherwise, things could get messier than you want them to.


Want to read more about relationships? Click HERE to read about how to move on from a relationship mistake.