I Will Never Forget My Incredibly Awkward First Kiss

The memory will forever be ingrained in my mind.

We were standing outside his house. It was mid-March, and a cool breeze caused my hair to whip in front of my face. He pushed it away, and then we both leaned forward. It was my first kiss.

A girl and a guy's feet facing each other on grass

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Correct me if I'm wrong, but getting your first kiss is a memorable moment. From the time I was a little girl, I dreamed about it. I imagined that it would be perfect. But you know what? Not everything happens like the fairytales, as I'm sure you can imagine. First kisses, although magically wonderful, have the potential to be majorly awkward. I'm here to recount my painfully embarrassing first kiss that I wouldn't change for the world.

The Boy

I was 17-years-old when I met Eric*. I was at my best guy friend's house watching a movie, when a group of rowdy boys barged through the front door.

I studied each of them carefully to see if they looked familiar from school, but they were all new faces. To my surprise, each approached me and introduced themselves one by one.

One in particular caught my eye. Eric had blue eyes, blonde hair, my type by every means. We started talking, and within minutes I was completely smitten.

The rest of the group teased us, making sly comments hinting that Eric should totally ask me on a date. I was mortified, but also kind of thankful for the teasing, because Eric promptly took the cue from his friends and asked if I wanted to come over for a group movie night at his house later that week.

I'm sure I was a bright red hue when I agreed to the semi-date and put my cell phone number in his iPhone's address book.

The Date

The day of the group date, I was a hot mess. I had only exchanged a couple of back-and-forth texts with Eric, yet somehow I had already developed a whopping crush.

Because he was best friends with my best guy friend, I already heard he was pretty excited for our date. I was thrilled that the feeling was mutual, and in the back of my mind I thought maybe, just maybe, he could potentially be my first ever kiss.

The night went flawlessly. The group was a mix of guys and girls, but everyone was paired off. We made pizza, played a game of pool and then rounded out the night by piling into his movie room.

A group of girls and guys watching television

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The two of us sat squished in a movie chair, close enough that our hands just barely touched. The 17-year-old me thought it was the most romantic thing ever when, at the end of the night, he leaned over and said, "How about you and I go for a walk?"

My heart raced, my skin flushed and my only thought was, "I'm getting kissed tonight."

The Kiss

As we walked around his block, we chatted about life, family and stressful school projects that were wearing us down. Then, somehow, the conversation shifted.

"So, um, what's your dating life been like in high school?" he asked.

I was mortified. Sure, I had been on a few dates here and there, but honestly, I had been so preoccupied with my school work and extracurricular activities that boys hadn't been my first priority.

When I explained this to him, he nodded in agreement, and said that he was in the exact same boat. Phew, I didn't look like a total loser.

We walked in silence for a few moments and suddenly found ourselves in front of his house again. He walked me up to my truck, and we stood there leaning against it, chatting about how great the night had been.

As I was talking, he grabbed my hand. I instantly froze. Nervous energy ran up and down my body and all I could do was ramble on like a fool.

A girl and guy holding hands

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When I finally paused to take a breath, he smiled and let out a laugh. The wind picked up and my hair flew in every direction, covering my eyes and making me feel even more foolish.

He pushed the hair out of my face, and then, next thing I knew, his lips were touching mine.

Seems perfect right? Wrong.

My nerves got the best of me, and I totally clammed up. I kid you not, my knees were shaking, my eyes were open (don't ask me why) and my lips were pursed. The kiss lasted approximately half a second, and when he pulled away, I'm sure the look on my face was priceless.

I opened my mouth to speak, and what came out was absolute word vomit: "It will be better next time." Yes, I said that. You can cringe if you want to.

He looked at me. I looked at him. We were both humiliated. It had been the perfect night, with seemingly the most perfect guy. I had been waiting for this first kiss for what had seemed like forever, and now it had finally happened and I had ruined it by blurting out that phrase. 

I didn't say another word, I just gave him a quick hug and hopped in my truck.

The Truth

First kiss stories are pretty hard to forget. Whether good or bad, they'll always stay with you. So, my experience was not as amazing as I had imagined it would be, but whose first kiss really is?

Eric and I never got a second chance at making that kiss "better," but, hey, I finally got to pucker up and I have this awkward story that will last me my lifetime. That's all I need.

*Names have been changed.


Can't get enough of my embarrassing stories? Check out this piece HERE where I recount the time I told my best guy friend I liked him.