Here's How I Learned Crushin' on the 'Nice Guy' Is Always the Better Choice
Let me take you back to my sophomore year of high school.
I was a shy, somewhat fashionable brainiac who, although not totally nerdy, was definitely not "in" with the cool crowd.
My crush, Brandon*, was a tall, handsome football player with a slightly bad rep.
I met Brandon in 8th grade when my friend Hannah* introduced me to him and his friends at a pool party. From there, we developed a relationship.
We were by no means close, but we did hang out occasionally—or at least enough for me to develop a massive crush on him. Because I was extremely shy, Brandon never knew how I felt, until sophomore year that is.
That year, as usual, my high school hosted its annual girl-ask-guy Sadie Hawkins dance. I honestly didn't think going was even an option because I wasn't dating anyone and I was too much of a scaredy cat to ask a stranger or a crush.
But then, my best friend Jenna*, and the only person who knew I had a crush on Brandon, convinced me that I should ask him and we would go to the dance on a double date.
I don't know what gave me the courage to do it, but I asked Brandon. I had my mom drive me over to his house late one school night and leave a cute poster and some candy asking him to Sadies. For me, this was terrifying.
Usually when you ask someone to a dance, they get back to you in a timely manner, but that was not the case with Brandon.
Two days passed, and I hadn't received any kind of text or message from him. Torture, right? After a big push from Jenna, I decided to confront Brandon and I asked if he received my Sadies invitation.
Surprising enough, he did. He responded to me in a text saying, "I did! Thank you! My mom thought the way you asked was really cute."
Well, at least I knew he got it and his mom thought it was cute. But what did he think? Did he want to go with me? I had no idea.
Another week passed, and, finally, after pretty much giving up all hope, one school night there was a knock on my front door.
I scrambled out of my comfy position on the couch and headed to the door where there was a note and some chocolate Brandon had left on the footstep that said he'd go with me.
I was ecstatic.
Everything leading up to the dance seemed to go as planned. I picked out my dress, I coordinated a ride with Jenna and her date and I even figured out where we would go for dinner. I totally thought I was going to have my fairytale dance.
But then, Brandon's true colors showed. The night before Sadies, he called me up, said he sprained his ankle (which I later found out wasn't true), and was no longer going to be able to go with me.
I was heartbroken, embarrassed and most of all, frustrated. I knew Brandon had a bad reputation for not treating girls with 100% respect, but I honestly did not expect him to dump me like this, and to have the nerve to wait until the last minute to do it.
I immediately called Jenna up crying, and she talked me down from my hysteria.
"Forget him," she told me. "There are dozens of guys who'd be happy and lucky to go with you. Why don't you surprise Aidan* and ask him to go?"
Up until this point, I hadn't even considered Aidan as a date option. He had been my close friend since 7th grade, was a bonafide "nice guy" and had told me months before he had a crush on me. He was sweet, genuine and a total gentleman. How had I missed this?
Jenna and I quickly crafted a cute sign that spelled out "Sadie Hawkins?" in big, bold, red letters and ran over to Aidan's house. I called him up and told him to come outside, and when he saw the sign, a smile spread wide across his face. He immediately ran up to me and gave me a hug.
I didn't have to wait three weeks for an answer, right then and there he leaned over and said, "Are you kidding, I'd love to go." And just like that, I went from heartbroken to happy.
Aidan and I had the most wonderful time at the dance, such a good time, in fact, that this self-proclaimed nice guy and I even dated for a short period of time following it.
The lesson I learned from this whole experience is to always pick the good guy. The guy you really know and trust. The guy who might just be a friend, but you never know, could end up being so much more. Don't just pick the person you think would be great arm candy because, in the end, looks aren't everything.
It's been quite some time since I learned this lesson and it still holds true.
The guy I'm currently dating, who happens to be my first official boyfriend, is the kindest guy I've ever known. I'm drawn to him because he takes care of me and treats me with all the respect I could ever ask for—it's only a bonus that he's easy on the eyes, too. ????
My days of crushin' on the "bad boys," are over. I ended up with the perfect "nice guy" and I couldn't be more thankful.
*Names have been changed.
Getting rejected by your crush is never an easy thing. Read our tips for how to cope with the rejection HERE.