5 Pieces of Advice You Should Follow If You Plan to Ghost Someone

Let's start by saying ghosting is not the best way to end a relationship.

It selfishly protects you from having a difficult conversation, while simultaneously robbing the person you've been dating from getting any kind of closure about your relationship.

But in reality, none of us are perfect. Breaking things off with someone is hard, especially when you can just stop replying to their text messages. We get it—ghosting is just plain easier, which means people are going to do it, whether it's the right thing or not.

So if you're considering ghosting the person you've been seeing, you can at least make it as painless as possible. Keep scrolling for five pieces of advice you should follow if you're planning to ghost someone.

Phase It Out

Ghosting is so painful, primarily because it often seems to come out of nowhere. One minute everything's perfectly fine between you and your person, and the next they haven't replied to the last five text messages you've sent trying to solidify your weekend plans. There's no in-between phase, which could actually help soften the blow.

If you're planning to ghost someone, don't just quit cold turkey. Instead, try to phase out your relationship over the course of a couple weeks. Pick and choose the text messages you'll reply to and make your hangouts less and less frequent. That way, when you stop replying all together, they'll at least have a hint that something was off. It probably won't stop their hurt completely, but it will make it easier to accept the fact that you just weren't that into them.

Pretty Little Liars: Aria looking at her phone worried

(Pretty Little Liars via Freeform)

 

Excuses, Excuses

While full-on ghosting is the easiest option, there are ways to break off a relationship and still spare someone's feelings. Instead of simply disappearing, you can always go the excuse route. Every time your potential partner asks you to hang out, come up with some kind of prearranged plan that would prevent you from seeing each other. A family night, an evening with your friends, a soccer practice—it doesn't really matter what it is, just find a way to ensure that you're always busy. After a few excuses, they'll get the hint that you don't want to hang out anymore, effectively ending your relationship and eliminating the need to keep talking to them.

 

Avoid Romance

As we've made clear, ghosting hurts most when it happens out of the blue. If you're planning to ghost someone, the worst thing you can do is pretend that everything's all fine and dandy, only to totally disappear on them on the very next day. When ghosting someone, it's crucial to avoid anything even remotely romantic for at least a week leading up to your disappearance. That means no fancy dinner dates, no kissing and no talking about feelings. If they try to initiate something, don't be afraid to make it obvious that you're not into it. It'll definitely feel awkward in the moment, but it will give them something to point back to once you're gone that'll justify why the relationship ended.

Pretty Little Liars: Hanna rolling her eyes with Caleb in the background

(Pretty Little Liars via Freeform)

 

Unfollow

If you're going to ghost someone, it's better to completely cut off all contact. We all know there's nothing worse than being ghosted, only to have the person who disappeared watch every Insta story you ever post until the end of time. Ghosting someone requires total commitment, which means you also need to unfollow them on all social media. Not only will it create more space between the two of you, it will also send them a very clear message that you're just not interested anymore.

 

Prepare for Backlash

Ghosting might make things easier for you, but only for the moment. It saves you from a difficult conversation, but it also automatically makes you the bad guy. No one is going to agree with your methods, as everyone knows the pain it causes when someone you care about just disappears. We understand ghosting happens, but we also think you need to be prepared to face the backlash. If the person you were seeing starts speaking poorly about you or makes their dislike of you very apparent, that's kind of the price you have to pay for the ease that accompanies ghosting. Ending a relationship is never going to be 100% drama-free, so be sure you consider the consequences before you decide to ghost someone.

Joey King's character in The Kissing Booth lounging by the pool while on her phone

(The Kissing Booth via Netflix)

 

Worried you might be the ghostee and not the ghoster? Click HERE for five signs you're about to be ghosted.