5 Ways to Break Out of the Cycle of Perfectionism

Do you consider yourself a perfectionist?

Perfectionists always want to do a top-notch job, ensuring that every detail is in place in order to keep everyone happy. While that may seem like a good thing on the surface, anyone who has these tendencies can also relate to a number of pitfalls.

Often, perfectionism is the result of not feeling good enough, resulting in a lot of unnecessary pressure and going above and beyond when it's not necessary. These high standards can make it difficult or even impossible to achieve your goals, which can result in procrastination and quickly lead to burnout. If you can relate, and are looking for ways to break out of this cycle to find great health and happiness, we have a few tips for you.

Gain a Better Understanding of Your Perfectionism

Breaking the cycle of perfectionism starts with looking inward. Notice when these tendencies arise, and why. Consider why you need this thing to be absolutely perfect, and where that expectation comes from, whether it's yourself, those who will be viewing your work or a nagging voice in your head—perhaps one that reflects sentiments from parental figures or superiors from your past, whose viewpoints aren't valid here.

Do you tie your productivity or the quality of your work with your self-worth? Maybe you push yourself beyond your limits because you feel you have to prove something due to anxiousness or insecurity. It may be tempting to cling to your tendencies because they feel safe, when really, they're not making your situation any better or helping you understand your worthiness, regardless of what you produce.

Instead, consider how it would make you feel if your result was less than perfect. Would anyone look at you differently if you gave a 95% effort instead of 100%? Would they even notice? Often, these things are inconsequential in the long run, and learning that can benefit you in so many ways.

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Don't Obsess Over Mistakes

If you're a perfectionist, chances are that you obsess over past mistakes and imagine that everyone else remembers every little hiccup or misstep you make. The good news is, that's simply not the case. We are always our biggest critics. Instead, remember that everyone makes mistakes, and they're rarely a big deal.

You've probably already gotten really good at spotting mistakes early on, or learning to fix them as they happen. For the other times, it can actually be healthy to occasionally make mistakes and have someone else point them out. This can remind you it's not the end of the world, and also can highlight areas where you can pay more attention and grow. Dealing with this can also help you get better at handling criticism and gracefully reacting to your mistakes. Instead of getting defensive, we suggest practicing gratitude. Thank them sincerely for catching it, apologizing if it's warranted and, if possible, promptly fix it without dwelling on it.

The fear of making mistakes can also limit you from reaching your full potential. You might struggle with doing new things for the first time because you hate when something doesn't turn out perfect. Instead of worrying about the outcome, go in with a beginner's mindset. Be open to failure, imperfection, learning and corrections in order to grow.

 

Practice Some Positive Affirmations

Speaking to yourself negatively and not believing you or your work is "good enough" tends to reinforce those ideas, and get you trapped in a cycle of pessimism. It may feel silly at first, but instead reframing your thoughts in the positive and saying some helpful affirmations can do wonders for your self-esteem and outlook on life.

Try some of the following, or twist them to be more suited to your situation:

• "I do enough. I am enough."
• "Some days, 20% is my 100%. That's okay."
• "I am not defined by my successes or failures."
• "I bounce back easily from setbacks."
• "Everything I experience, win or lose, is an opportunity for growth."

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Move the Goal Post

Once you get a better understanding of your perfectionist tendencies and their underlying causes, you can really start thinking about how to change your behavior. One of the most helpful things is to basically move the goal post. Instead of needing everything to be perfect, imagine what your life looks like when you instead focus on doing enough.

Many perfectionists have an all-or-nothing mindset, considering things to be either 100% a success or a failure. In reality, most things aren't so cut and dry. Something can get the job done without being flawless or the absolute best reflection of your potential, and that's okay! Just like you can make mistakes and still get an A on an exam, you can be imperfect and still do a stellar job that satisfies everyone.  You might also be familiar with the saying of "C's get degrees." You don't have to be anywhere near perfect to graduate and be considered qualified in your field, and sometimes, restraints on your time and energy necessitate a partial effort.

In a work environment, it may also be helpful to look at your colleagues and reflect on their output. Maybe they're also perfectionists and they make you feel like you have to keep up, or maybe they don't push themselves nearly as hard and get less done, but are still doing a great job and being an asset to the company. You don't have to prove anything by outdoing them. Think about different ways you can go easier on yourself and lighten that mental load.

 

Embrace the Benefits of Letting Go

Believe us when we say you have a lot to gain by letting go of perfectionism. By slowly implementing these practices, you can establish a better relationship with your sense of self-worth, feeling happier and healthier in the process. Less pressure on yourself means less stress, and less time dedicated to superfluous details gives you more time to relax or partake in enjoyable activities. Learn to enjoy this sensation.

Even letting ago only occasionally gives you a new baseline to use as a point of comparison. Anytime you're tempted by your perfectionist tendencies, you can weigh what you have to gain by giving it 110% against what you have to gain by doing just enough.

Relishing in being imperfect can also be empowering. If you've ever not applied for a job or tried out for some kind of role because you felt you were unqualified, you might be more willing to take that risk. You might go after opportunities, even if they do require a huge investment of time and effort, because you know they'll be worth it. The important thing isn't being flawless. The important thing is trying. 

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Looking for even more inspiration? Click HERE to read some of our favorite affirmations for becoming more fearless in 2025.