How to Tell Your Family About Your Breakup
Breakups are already hard enough, shouldn't the trauma end at letting go of someone you really care about?
Unfortunately, no. While breakups carry their fair share of damage, there are a lot of post-split factors to consider that have nothing to do with your ex-S.O. For example, telling your family about the end of your relationship.
Find the Right Moment
Whether you're deeply affected by your breakup or already over the relationship, you should still search for a quiet and peaceful moment to tell your family. Blurting it out spontaneously will definitely be awkward, and it will probably lead to many more questions since your parents feel blindsided by the information. You don't have to make a big deal about it, but try to break the news in a private setting where your parents can really pay attention to what you're saying. It might still be uncomfortable, but it will definitely go a lot more smoothly.
(Riverdale via The CW)
Keep It Short and Sweet
When it comes to telling your family about your breakup, it's best to keep things short and sweet. You don't need to dive into every conversation or give a detailed explanation as to why you and your S.O. decided to end it. In all likelihood, it will just drag out a tough discussion as your family asks more and more questions about the end of your relationship. Let them know things have ended, and give a brief explanation as to why things fell apart. It keeps you from reliving the trauma and it allows the most sensitive information to stay between you and your ex, where it belongs.
Be Prepared for Questions
No matter how simply and succinctly you explain your split, your family will likely have questions. Try to think about their potential concerns, and come up with a few answers that you feel comfortable with. In addition, don't get annoyed with them for inquiring about what went wrong. Although it can be painful to talk about, try to remember that they're only asking because they care about you and want to make sure you're okay.
(Brave via Walt Disney Pictures)
Ask for Support
If your breakup was tough on you, it's more than okay to ask your family for support. If you feel that you're not in a good place, explain to them the toll that the breakup has taken on you. You're with your family more than anyone else, so you need to be honest about your mental and emotional state after a breakup. If you don't ask for support, they might assume you're totally fine. Make your needs known and allow yourself to lean on your family through this difficult time.
If you were the one to end the relationship or if you simply feel okay about calling off your romance, try to reassure your family and let them know that all this was for the best. Breakups can be incredibly difficult on your emotional health, as well as your mental well-being. Chances are your family will worry about you and assume the worst regarding the end of your relationship. While it might be frustrating to continually explain that you're totally fine, it will help ease your family's fears. Plus, it'll probably feel good to continually remind both yourself and other people around you that the breakup was a good thing, since it might not always seem like it.
(Pretty Little Liars via Freeform)
Unfortunately, you can't always rely on your family to be a positive support system following a split. The people you're closest to also have the unique ability to make everything worse by saying and doing things that trigger negative feelings inside of you. If you've found that you're not comfortable relying on your family, set boundaries within your relationship.
Let them know you prefer not to discuss the breakup, that you don't really want to hear about their criticism of the relationship or that you just need to talk things through without any response on their part. Set clear guidelines for what you do and don't want from them, and walk away from the situation if you feel they can't respect your boundaries. You need to take care of your emotional well-being, and if your family can't provide the support you need, it's okay to turn to other sources of comfort and encouragement.
Looking for more advice on mixing your family life and your romantic life? Click HERE to learn why it's important that your family likes your S.O.