These Are the Signs of an Unsuccessful First Date

You may have suspicions that a first date isn't going so well, but the dating waters are murky and often times tough to navigate.

If you left a first date wondering what in the world just happened, we're here to help you figure out your feelings.

We spoke with the Love Doctor Terri Orbuch and she revealed the signs of an unsuccessful first date.

Continue reading to see if your night out qualifies:

1. You Have Zero Similarities

While it may be widely considered that "opposites attract," this isn't necessarily true. Terri tells us, "If you have zilch-o in common—no values, no interests, no friends in common, nothing, that'a sign. Because like it or not, similarities help us to develop a relationship over time."

Awkward first date, She's the Man

(She's the Man via DreamWorks)


2. You Find Their Quirks Annoying, Not Endearing

While everyone has their own quirks, not everyone is such a big fan of them. Whether you can't stand the tone of someone's voice or you've had enough of their hand gestures, you probably haven't found your soulmate.

Terri notes, "There are these quirks that people have— either how they say things or the words they use or their mannerisms—and for some people on a first date, it's not going well because they can't stand these quirks."

So basically, if you feel the irritation growing in your body, try not to deny the obvious: This isn't going to work.


3. It's All About Them

A major red flag that Terri warned us about is if the date is self-absorbed and hasn't asked you any questions.

"That means they weren't interested in getting to know you, they were only interested in talking about themselves. That's someone who is not ready to have a relationship because any relationship is give and take."

Callie and Aaron on a bad first date

(The Fosters via Freeform)


4. They Deflect Your Questions

If your date is giving vague answers to your questions or outright deflecting them, this could be a sign of an unsuccessful date.

"If you're asking a lot of questions and they're changing the topic or they're really uncomfortable with answering, that's another sign that they're not ready to date because they're not trusting," Terri explains. "I encourage people to not tell a life story, but you do want to answer a question."


5. They Tell Their Whole Life Story

Conversely of the last sign, Terri notes that another red flag is if your date reveals everything about themselves.

It's a problem "if they tell you their life story, their woes and their challenges" right away, she says. "I encourage people to share a chapter a date. Just like a book, it gets people into the story and then they want to know more. If you tell the whole story on the first date, then there is no interest or excitement or desire to get to know that person more."


6. The Cold Shoulder

Lastly, if your date says a weak goodbye then they probably aren't interested in a second meet-up.

Some examples of cold shoulder farewells that Terri note are, "I'll talk to you later," or "I hope you have a good night."

If your date doesn't show interest in a second date that night, they probably won't have much interest down the road.

Insecure bad date scene

(Insecure via HBO)


If you're ready to get over the person you like once and for all, click HERE for more advice from the Love Doctor on how to uncrush.