12 Relatable Squidward Quotes That Make Perfectly Angsty Instagram Captions

We know that Squidward Tentacles is the true star of SpongeBob SquarePants.

If you relate to Squidward on a spiritual level, keep reading to discover all of his best quotes that work perfectly as Instagram captions.

For the photo of you dancing barefoot after taking off your cute but blister-inducing shoes:

"Oh, my aching tentacles." – Squidward Tentacles, "Pizza Delivery," SpongeBob SquarePants


For the pic of you practicing the hobby that's going to make you famous—someday:


For the  shot of you being an unrepentant troublemaker:

"Why is it whenever I'm having fun, it's wrong?" – Squidward Tentacles, "Fools in April," SpongeBob SquarePants


For a not-so-subtle hint that you're crushing on a boy in your picture:

"Oh no, he's hot!" – Squidward Tentacles, "Squilliam Returns," SpongeBob SquarePants


For the photo of you lounging in bed until noon on the weekend:

"Wake me up when I care." – Squidward Tentacles, "Gullible Pants," SpongeBob SquarePants


For the photo of you not crying at the movie that has all of your besties in tears:

"I have no soul." – Squidward Tentacles, "Just One Bite," SpongeBob SquarePants


For every photo of you being the third wheel to your BFF and her S.O.:

"It's just a cruel reminder that I'm single and likely to remain that way forever."– Squidward Tentacles, "Love That Squid," SpongeBob SquarePants


For the pic of your tech-ignorant self struggling with basic modern technology:

"Future!!!" – Squidward Tentacles, "SB-129," SpongeBob SquarePants

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For the photographic explanation of everything that went wrong today:

"I knew I shouldn't have gotten out of bed today." – Squidward Tentacles, "Banned in Bikini Bottom," SpongeBob SquarePants


For those rare moments you get really dolled up for a night on the town:

"But it's my only night to be fancy!" – Squidward Tentacles, "Chocolate With Nuts," SpongeBob SquarePants


For that exhausted Friday night selfie announcing you'll be sleeping the whole weekend away:

"I might as well sleep for 100 years or so." – Squidward Tentacles, "Are You Happy Now?," SpongeBob SquarePants

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For the magnificent photo of your completely unhealthy, but unquestionably delicious, meal before you chow down:

"I think my heart just stopped." – Squidward Tentacles, "Your Shoe's Untied," SpongeBob SquarePants


If you still need some Instagram guidance, click HERE for Instagram captions that work for every post of you and your bestie.