Unpacking the Fear of Loneliness
For as long as I've had the brain capacity to remember, I've struggled with never wanting to be alone.
Whether it be my incurable case of only child syndrome or my Aries sun making it nearly impossible to be without company, trying to relax or enjoy some quality me-time has always been something I avoided at all costs. Through trial and error, I figured out why I fear being alone and, with time, learned to love it.
Where Loneliness Shows Up
Loneliness can show up at the most random times and places. Perhaps a memory brings you back to a time you were with someone you miss, or you haven't had some good quality time with friends in a while. Maybe you are feeling homesick or just got home from the best weekend with your partner, and the dread of coming to an empty house sinks in. Loneliness can look very different for people, but one thing that stands true is that it's a painful emotion to experience.
Also read about:The Dos and Don'ts for a Successful Long-Distance Relationship
Why You're Feeling Lonely
You could be feeling lonely for so many reasons. Maybe you're like me, and after growing up without siblings, you crave being around people because you never had an annoying sister constantly in your space and stealing your clothes. Alternatively, maybe you're an extrovert who gets their energy from being around others. I came to realize that my aversion to solitude stemmed from it reminding me of all the things I've been putting off, and frankly, I've never felt a sense of joy being on my own, without the company of other people. Being by myself and sitting with my thoughts was never something that gave me comfort.
Ways to Combat Loneliness
Whatever form of loneliness you feel, use it as an opportunity to do a journal entry on everything that is coming up for you during your time alone, reconnect with loved ones, catch up on your favorite shows, do a craft or a creative activity or any self-care activities that fill you up. If you're missing family or friends, plan to see them again and fill an agenda with all the things you both love doing. If you're avoiding some well-deserved you-time, use the day to do everything you love while sneaking in a couple of small things from your to-do list.
The Power of Me-Time
Once loneliness is no longer a fear in your life, you'll find that having me-time is just the thing you need to recuperate, recharge and get your life back in order. It could be what you need to deepen your connection with and take care of yourself. At the end of the day, you need to be your own best friend, because you are the one person who will always have your back.
Want to see some podcasts I love listening to during alone time? Click HERE for the mental health podcasts that have me hooked.