9 Things to Make Small Talk About When You Don’t Know What to Say

While some people may find small talk generally meaningless or shallow, it's never a bad idea to master it.

Even if the content of small talk isn't super significant or consequential, it can foster a powerful sense of connection and put people at ease. That paves the way for making real friends—and having the types of deep, purposeful conversations you'd rather be having. If you're the type of person who doesn't see the point of small talk or finds it frustrating, it might be challenging to keep a chat flowing when you run out of things to say. Below are nine tried and true small talk topics to keep in your back pocket.

Their Day

While asking someone how they are is pretty standard, we find that it often results in brief responses without much substance, and that people who aren't doing great feel pressured to lie and say the day's going fine. Instead, asking someone about how their day has been going so far is more likely to elicit a more specific and truthful response. You can follow this up with questions about what they've been up to and how life has treated them today, which might inspire further discussion.

(via Unsplash)

 

Their Favorite Media

Most people have some kind of media they're passionate about, so don't be afraid to ask if they've really enjoyed anything recently, whether that's books, music, games, movies, TV shows, podcasts or even just a social media creator they follow closely. It's a pretty open-ended question that means they can talk about the newest movie in theaters, or a comforting ancient TV series they've returned to again and again. This is also a way to find out what types of things you might have in common, and even if you're not familiar with their favorites, people often open up when given the chance to ramble about the things they love.

 

Their Hobbies

Similarly, asking about hobbies can really bring people out of their shells. Ask about what kinds of hobbies they have and what they do with their free time and you might be surprised to find out about people's unusual interests, creative endeavors, unique knowledge and unexpected abilities. Give them a chance to brag a little bit about themself and find out what brings them joy.

 

Also read about: Avoid These 5 Phrases to Sound More Confident When You Speak

 

The Location

A lot of the time when you're making small talk with a stranger, it's in a new or interesting location, which gives you another key topic to chat about. Maybe it's at a party and you can ask about how they know the host, or it's at a school event and you can discuss academic life and whether they're local or not. Perhaps it's some kind of festival or convention, allowing you to wonder what brings them there and what they're looking forward to most. Even things like a place's decor or layout can come up if they're relevant.

(via Unsplash)

 

Their Outfit

Compliments are another thing that can make a person feel seen and ease their anxieties. Our rule of thumb is always to share appreciation of something the other person chose, whether that's their outfit and accessories or choice of hair cut, rather than something innate about their appearance that's out of their control. Essentially, you're complimenting their tastes and conveying that you might have a similar approach to style, while hopefully giving their ego a little boost as well.

 

Their Plans

You can't go wrong with asking people about their immediate plans, whether you're curious about what they're doing that evening, the following day or over the weekend. It shows interest in them and their lives, without putting on any additional pressure (like questions about their future or their career and life plans might). You may also make them feel more comfortable sharing your own plans, especially if they're low-key, like recharging from the work week at home and taking it easy, so they don't feel like they have to one-up you or have anything exciting on the horizon.

 

Also read about: 8 Tips to Communicate More Assertively and Get What You Want Out of Life

 

Their Recommendations

We find that in general, people enjoy sharing the things they love with other people and spreading that joy, which is why it's easy to ask people for their recommendations about just about anything. In addition to the media we mentioned earlier, you might want to ask about favorite local restaurants, cool places to see of hobbies to try out. It's another question that's bound to get people to light up and forget about any trepidation they might have about speaking to new people.

(via Unsplash)

 

Their Travels

While not everyone has had the opportunity to travel to far and exciting places, those who have are usually more than happy to chat about their journeys. There's so much to ask someone about their travels, from the locations they've visited and the best things they experienced there to the reason they decided to go in the first place. Many people will also be eager to tell you about their dream vacations and destinations on their bucket lists.

 

The Weather

While talking about the weather may seem a little basic, it's a classic for a reason. Each and every day has some kind of weather, weather that's hot, cold or somewhere in between, clear, cloudy, raining or snowy, dry or humid. People talk just as much about unusual weather as they do weather that's perfectly expected. It's rarely going to be the most engaging topic, but it can be a good conversation starter to get the ball rolling about other, more interesting, things.

 

Want to become a stronger communicator? Click HERE for our tips on being more articulate and making yourself heard.